Blues at the Brewery
Someone asked me the other day why I get so frustrated with folks like Taylor Corum and Brad Passons. As one who pretends to be a performing songwriter, once I sort through all the bias and the impressions, I feel like I'm frustrated by the fact that they are the best self-promoters I know. Nobody I know drives harder at promoting than these two fellows, and few people succeed better. If Taylor or Brad came up to me and offered to be my manager for a 75% take, I'd sign on that line in a heartbeat. I've begun to learn the professional side of this deal, and maybe one day I'll feel like I'm not just playing charades. I just can't embrace self-promotion on that level without feeling dirty in some right. Maybe my level of attachment to it is less than professional. I don't really know.
But, I've convinced myself that I've got to start writing again - and like a beast at that. No album is ever going to happen while I sit back with these few songs and wait to be able to afford it, unless of course you'd like to send me a quick $3000 dollars in the mail. Perhaps I could persuade Andy Osenga to help me out, but my writing is not where I want it to be. Neither is my playing. Listening to guys like Sam Bush and The Bills, I remember that my clout as an instrumentalist would outweigh the nearest 90-lbs wuss, soaking wet. And put that together with writers like Malcolm Holcombe, Daniel Lanois, and the whole Square Peg Alliance, and I realize that I've got so much work and patience ahead of me. And patience is not something I'm great at when it comes to growing. I was always one to see if the Flintstone vitamins really worked. At 5' 8", they didn't.
I don't know if I'll ever feel like I'm at a point where I can say, "Yep, this is where I've always wanted to get to, now let's go from here." It's humbling and joyous though, to see people you idolize having to scratch it out on paper, having to make sure every detail is at least near-perfect. At least, then, if writers and musicians with the real talent have to do that, folks like me may have a chance. I always appreciate your support when you come out to shows. All those comments on musicians' websites and MySpaces that people leave, those actually mean something to us. Unless you have an entourage and thousands of fans, comments and advice really do help encourage. Nothing means more than someone telling you how a particular song struck them.